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Santorum Re-imagined

March 1, 2012

As my attention is usually set on the kitchen I don’t have a lot of time to focus on politics and issues. Recently though, someone brought to my attention that a man running for president named Rick Santorum has come under attack by gays and liberals for certain things he said, what they are I do not know. What I do know is that a man named Daniel Savage began a campaign to define Rick Santorum’s last name, Santorum, as a neologism:

The frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the by-product of anal sex.

Again, I do not pay attention to political issues and I can’t imagine what Santorum might have said to upset Daniel so much as to provoke him to spread this false definition. But I’m starting a campaign of my own to re-define Santorum one last time as a scrumptious dessert that you’ll be serving at your classiest dinner parties. Pay attention guys.

Start by taking a Snickers bar and sticking it in the microwave for a minute and a half.

Next, we’re going to pour out some whole milk into a bowl. It’s gotta be whole milk guys, the low fat stuff just isn’t creamy enough.

You want to make sure the entire base of the bowl is covered, you shouldn’t have any dry patches.

Now our Snickers has cooked down and it looks absolutely divine. The smooth chocolate balanced out by the crunchy peanuts is a combination that is just to die for.

Take a look at the new Santorum. I don’t see any lubricant and I don’t see any fecal matter. Just two ingredients combined in a perfect synergy to create an elegant dessert. Hopefully, Rick Santorum will be associated with this image from now on.

 

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2 Comments
  1. GoPats89 permalink

    That’s gay dude

  2. DWDdad permalink

    I must object to any definition of Santorum that is either sweet or edible. Onomatopoeia mandates that anything known as Santorum must be sour and ignorant.

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